


Letters from a warden - 07

by Tak



Series: Letters from a warden [7]
Category: Dragon Age II, Dragon Age: Origins
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-16
Updated: 2013-10-16
Packaged: 2017-12-29 14:58:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,722
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1006758
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tak/pseuds/Tak
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Never lose hope. Never waste time. Hours slip by like seconds when the shadow is at your back"</p>
            </blockquote>





	Letters from a warden - 07

The large mug of ale thumped down heavily beside him. Zevran looked up to see who would invade his personal space. He had been left to wallow in his own concoction of self pity and regret since arriving at the tavern in Denerim.  
"You tried to woo the warden." Taliesen said following his mug and taking the seat next to the assassin. "Except for some reason you let her Woo you."  
Zevran sat in silence taking a huge gulp of ale.   
"The stories I hear though say you failed." His former comrade in arms pried. "You failed against a girl and her dog."  
"And a second grey warden, a witch of the wild, and a qunari warrior. " He looked side long at the human his eyes narrowed "Do not think I just let her go. I was at her mercy."  
Taliesen's face twisted in an evil smile "Ah yes your favourite."   
Zevran sighed heavily "If you were sent to end me, do not torment me with words. Let me finish my drink and we can go out side. I'm sure the owner would thank us for not spilling blood on the floor."  
Taliesen sipped slowly at his drink. "You could come back. We could make a story for an elaborate scheme you cooked up, to explain your absence. Wouldn't be the first time."   
"And finish the job?"  
"Yes."   
Zevran raised his mug to his lips, churning his words over in his brain. Break his vow, not that he hadn't done that in leaving, and murder her.   
"It's your life or hers." Taliesen mused "Once that would have been all you needed to hear."  
Again Taliesen's words were met with silence, he turned away from the elf and looked towards the bar, preparing the final twist to get his former comrade to see sense. "I hear the wardens are to wed, become King and Queen of Ferelden. Rule over us all and bring peace and harmony to the land."   
Zevran had stopped breathing while he spoke. The sharp feeling returned as if Taliesen's words were twisting in his stomach turning to blades and bile. It was not a feeling he was use too and now it had happened twice in a very short time.  
"I'll do it."  
~

"You're a Crow?" The tiny Hawke asked standing before him, arms crossed frown set deep in her brow, piercing eyes locked on him.  
"Not of the feathered kind." He responded "but yes."   
Willow crossed her arms, Zevran couldn't help a smile as he saw her mothers mannerisms replicated on a smaller scale in the child. "The Crows, they kill people for money."   
"It's one of the things we do." He looked around to try and find some one to help him out of the conversation, but the other adults and even Sunshine were busy. He was left trying to explain assassination to a child.   
"Do you get lots of money?"   
"You can do."   
"I think I will be a Crow." She said, nodding her head with her words.   
He laughed and knelt before her. "It is not the most enjoyable of lives little one.   
An assassins life is a lonely one With out many lovers or friends."   
She chewed her lip for a moment "You made friends with Mama and Papa."   
"I did yes. But I have a few luxuries as the head of the Crows."  
"Then when I am big I will have your job."   
He laughed at her certainty, ruffling her dark locks "I am almost certain you will. But that is a decision best left for a few years yes? When you have a better concept of what you will be giving up."

_Cousin he came back._

Standing at the top of the great stair in the Arl's estate Dae stared off into the distance leaning heavily on the bannister.   
Wynne had noticed the change in their sweet cherry Warden, no longer did she flit from place to place, smiling and laughing, with never a still moment. Now she lingered, and since their meeting with the Arl, learning of Alistair's heritage, and his proposal. She had become so distant she was almost a different person. After the Crow had left, the older woman had though Dae would come to her senses, after all she an Alistair had always gotten along divinely, and a blind man could see the young man adored her. Yet all of a sudden, the sweet warden had retreated back into herself.  
"Loghain demise was his own folly." The wise Mage told her gently wondering if his execution had anything to do with her melancholy.   
Dae remained silent, and still at her words.  
"You have a chance to see Ferelden defeat this blight. We have all the support we need. things are hopeful."   
"Hopeful." She uttered turning her back to the banister and crossing her arms. "Yes things are hopeful for defeating the Arch Demon."   
Wynne smiled "and for you as well."  
The warden sighed "Fereldens worst kept secret."  
"A chance to be queen."  
"I don't want to be queen, let Anora take my place." She snapped.  
"Alistair doesn't trust Anora, nor love her."  
"And I can't love Alistair the way he loves me." She exclaimed loudly unable to keep her frustration at bay. Startled by the volume of her words she contained her self. "He says it doesn't matter. He says he would rather have a friend at his side." She sighed again heavily "but I know it would."  
The old woman observed at the young one and her anger. Her dark hair cascading freely across her face and shoulders. "You think Zevran will come back." She said slowly.  
"It's a coin toss. He either will or he won't."  
Wynne swallowed visibly "If he does?"  
Dae laughed, low and cynically "You think I'm naive? If he does it will be because some how he was offered a second chance and he values his life more than mine."  
Wynne gasped "Aren't you worried?"  
"Wynne." Dae hushed her laying a hand on her shoulder, "I am no longer afraid. It is simply that."

Dae filled the Basin that sat on her duchess with water and soaked a cloth in it. Readying herself to rid her body of the days grime. She looked in the mirror as she brushed her hair back behind her shoulders, the little candle next to her only reflected her skin. Her hair, her clothes, the room all so dark, but if she had wanted light she would have stayed in the main hall.  
Returning her hands to the warm water she felt a cold line draw across her throat.   
Looking up into the mirror, never flinching at the long curved blade that caressed her flesh, curling around her jugular, the sharp tip kissing her in the crook of her jaw.   
She caught the reflection of his eyes, the gold igniting under the firelight.   
"I'm glad it is you." She said softly, her only movement was to remove her hands from the wash bowl, the only sound was the slow drip from her fingertips.  
"You know." He said, she could feel his lips against her ear, "Most, beg for their life."  
Her damp hand touched his arm, sliding up to the hand that held tightly on to the blade at her throat.   
"You made the decision whether or not to kill me along time ago. If I haven't changed your mind before. I will not change it now." She paused before adding "My life is yours." 

In one quick fluid motion he shoved the bowel out of the way, the water showering the floor. He turned her pushing her back onto the duchess her head against the mirror, back against the wall. The blade was raised, its aim was set, pointed for her heart. His eye narrowed and it plunged forward .   
She heard the thump as it lodged in the wood next to her.   
Zevran hung his head leaning on the hilt he let out a heavy exhale.  
"No." He whispered "I am yours." 

She pushed his hair back off his face and lifted his chin, drawing his gaze off the floor and up to her eyes as she pulled herself from the wall to standing. He held her like she could disappear, his arms circling her waist, he leant forward and pressed his lips to hers in an attempt to express how he had missed her in the time apart, the kiss became fervent, stealing her breath. She placed a hand on his chest and pushed him away.  
Reluctantly he separated from her, but her left hand remained over his heart. He looked at it, the intention was clear, with that hand she could kill him quick and painlessly.   
Once he wouldn't have believed it, but since the word got out about King Alistair's Kind Executioner. He understood she had stepped forward to make it as clean as possible. That in her own way she was trying to be kind, but In the taverns they joked about the handprint that was still visible on his chest as they buried him.   
"Zevran stop." She said, her voice quiet and firm, keeping him at a distance with that hand.  
"What happened To you?" Her eyes searched his face for answers "One minute we were fine, better than fine, then you were venom."  
He looked away, grabbing her by the wrist and removing her hand so he could move.   
"No." She snapped "No, now you answer me." Anger was raging behind her dark blue eyes, the likes he had not seen. Pulling her arm around and him with it. "You do not break into my room threaten to kill me, and say what you said, with out giving me a few answers."   
"Why?"  
She wrenched her hand from his. "Why?" She exclaimed pulling away from him, picking up the bowl as she crossed the room and opened the door, letting the light of the hall spill in. "Because I am not playing any more." Her voice lowered as she looked back at him bathed in warm candle light "Twice now you have threatened my life. There are only so many chances I am willing to take." She took pause to let him speak, she could see the battle on his face, and he tried to find words to explain. His heart wanting to tell her what she wanted to hear, his head wanting to hid it. Deeming it a weakness or a liability.  
"I grew up amongst those who sold the illusion of love," he began slowly quietly, his voice seemingly floating out from the darkness of the room, "Then I was trained to make my heart cold in favour of the kill. To cut every one off and yet, You have known me more deeply and cared more for me than any one." He stepped towards her. "You believed I was worth more than just what my skills could offer. Every thing I have been taught tells me what I feel for you in return is wrong."  
Dae closed the door as he spoke. Returning the bowl to the table and picked up the lone candle. She walked around the dark room slowly adding little stars of light, bringing brightness as she moved.  
He continued, his eyes following her as she moved. "An assassin must learn to forget sentiment. It's dangerous, you take your pleasures where you can, where life is good, to expect any thing more would be reckless.  
I thought it was the same between us, something to enjoy, a Distraction and a little more and yet..." He paused "we learned Alistair could be king, I knew it was only a matter of time until you realised he was more fitting of your station. For the first time, I was jealous."  
She paused in her duty, as he came to the core of the problem.  
"Childish I know, but ever since that night at the lake, I have been nothing but confused."   
She placed the candle down and now with the room illuminated she stood and faced him.  
"I trusted you, I gave you my heart." She said solemnly.  
"And I didn't deserve it." He took her hands "I certainly don't now. I was foolish, in a realm I didn't understand."  
"As I was." Her face was stern, unwavering "but I did not bite the hand extended to help me."  
He clenched his teeth, his eyes closing searching his brain for those pretty words she loved so much, finding nothing. He sighed,   
She kissed his hands, making him open his eyes and look at her. "I swear to Andraste and her husband the Maker, if this happens a third time." She warned "your handsome face will be Remembered by all in a statue of ice."   
He laughed, but trailed off as her serious face never changed.   
She searched him, torturing him with her steal glance. Holding him in her gaze watching him squirm.   
"You have to promise me." She said finally "That you are done with the Crows." She pointed to the blade in the wall. "This can never, ever happen again."   
He nodded.  
"Say it!"  
"I promise. But the crows are in Danerium, and they know you are here."  
"Then" she said plainly "I will deal to them."  
"You will?"  
"I will, as I dealt with the Tevintar's in the alienage and Loghain."  
Something had changed in his sweet warden, hardened the edges of her to sharp points. He brushed a strand of hair away from her face tucking it behind her ear and touched her cheek.  
"So hard, Warden, so stern." He whispered.  
"You took my warmth and laughter with you when you left."   
His fair brows knotted, of all the things he was worried about changing her, it was he that did it.   
He tilted her head forward so he could kiss her forehead. "For that I was wrong. I am so sorry." He was making no head way with her. Did he really think he would. Did he think she was so forgiving.   
Her shoulders slumped, she stepped forward, her arms going around his waist her chin resting on his shoulder.   
"So very wrong." She said laughing just a little "Though I too am sorry, I stooped to your level, and said some regrettable things."  
"You wound me with your sharp tongue." He mused, "I should have known I would never escape you unscathed."   
He felt her breath on his neck "Defeated again," she whispered into his ear kissing the lobe.   
"You are a weakness of mine Little flower."  
She stepped to the side her left hand trailing his abdomen her right hand sweeping his hair to one side, she kissed the nape of his neck as she drew his last blade from its sheath in his back, the short blade almost a comfortable fit in her hand. She felt his body tense as the blade left his body, he turned to her as she tossed it to one side of the room.   
"I find it cruel you'd leave me defenceless, when you are never unarmed."   
He made to catch her, but she slid out of his reach, her trailing fingers loosing the buckle that held the sheath, so it clattered to the floor.  
He caught her hand spinning her into his grasp like some kind of strange dance. Her back to him it was his turn to kiss and bite her nape. His free hand trailing up her thigh, the new robe she wore providing little resistance with the thigh high split. He slipped under the cloth his finger tips trailing her abdomen.  
"I doubt your defenceless." She breathed leaning into him, curling her head back, his mouth moved to her lips. She felt his desire growing, hers as well, they had months apart and though her broken heart had for the longest time done nothing but incur wroth at the mere mention of his name. She ached for him, her flesh remembering his touch..  
His fingers found the lacing at the front of her garment. She un clasped her pauldrens and quickly moved to his. Stripping each other hastily as they lowered to the floor where they were. Desire speed their interaction, as they made love amongst the shed armour and clothes.

Spent, panting nose to nose. Slick from sweat, they lay together.  
"I heard a roomer you are to be a queen."  
Dae laughed 'I was asked, I haven't answered him yet."  
Her answer was not as reassuring as he would have liked "If you accept, it will make repeating this difficult." He sat up and faced her.   
Her eyes followed the dark lines that accentuated the curves of his body. Saying nothing she intertwined her fingers with his.  
"Lets not fool each other yes." he paused turning to her "You have made your self a fine match. And if he proves a poor husband you know who to hire." He pulled away "I will make it easy, if we can no longer be, we can no longer be."  
"Still?" She laughed. "You are so quick to assume I will choose him over you."  
"A King or a Crow. I know my worth." He uttered bitterly.   
"You really truly don't." She cupped his cheek with her hand. Her flesh cold against his flushed skin. She turned him towards her. "I'm not marrying Alistair." Her tone dry as she was loosing patience "life it to short to waste it on any thing less than happiness"  
She sighed "No, I too made a choice long ago, what ever time I have, I wish to spend it with you."  
"Why?" He couldn't believe her words, this was the stuff fairy tales were made of, not reality. The Nobel girl never ran of to be with the gutter rat in reality. Sense and survival told her to follow her head not her heart.  
"You are some one, a heart does not forget." 

He pressed his lips to her hair line as the light began to trickle through the thick curtains. It was the first night they had spent together, Properly taking time to do something other than just roll in the sack. The first night in the frozen inn, there was less on a focus on love and more on lust and not freezing in the snowy landscape to count.  
She had drifted to sleep on him, her breath tickled his flesh as she nuzzled into his chest. Though he himself had not slept all night, he lay more content than he had been in many years.   
Dae whimpered in her sleep, her fingers grabbed tightly to the blankets as her brow knotted. Her breathing became ragged, gaining speed as she began hyperventilating. Ripped from sleep she cried out softly sitting up right, eyes wild. Coming to reality quickly she pulled her knees up and hung her head in her hands.   
Silently Zevran put an arm around her shoulders, pulling her back into his arms.   
"The darkspawn dreams are stronger now?" He asked her.   
"So much so." She whispered as if talking about would inspire more. But they weren't just dark spawn nightmares she was having. It wasn't just the arch demon talking to her in the night.   
_"Here lies the abyss, the well of all souls._  
From these emerald waters doth life begin anew.  
Come to me, child, and I shall embrace you.  
In my arms lies Eternity. "  
Andraste spoke to her through the words of the chants. Calling her to her end, It was her choice, the spirit in the fade said as much. A choice that could change more than her own future. She looked up at Zevran, his usually happy face wrote with concern.  
She smiled "just nightmares, the day will wash them away." 

Shining bright the morning forced them to dress and venture out into the world. Descending the stairs and entering the hall to find Aemon and their newly appointed king to create battle plans for the final push.   
On endearing the hall, Alistair stood. "What on earth is he doing back?" He shouted drawing his blade. In half a breath Zevran had unsheathed his own weapons to defend himself. "Making up for the error of my ways, as well as angering the King apparently." He quipped. "Though it wouldn't be the first time."  
"If your back to finish your contract." Alistair growled "You'll have to go through me."   
"Foolish chantry boy, you think I would just wander down for breakfast if I was plotting murder?"   
"I wouldn't put it past you."   
"Boys!" Dae scolded placing herself between them "Sheath your weapons, now."  
Zevran pointed to Alistair "Him first."   
Alistair laughed in response "No I think I'm going to keep something sharp and pointy aimed at your vital organs as long as your going to be around."  
Dae let out a growl of frustration and grabbed them both by an ear dragging them over to the bench seats at the side of the hall. The stone walls resounded by the indignant whimpers of both King and Crow, as she pushed them towards the seats.  
"What was that?" She scolded the both of them, "Neither of you have ever been so foolish before."   
Alistair opened his mouth to speak pointing to Zevran, the words stolen from his mouth by Dae's scowled.  
"He started..." Zevran trailed off catching the same frozen and disapproving look from her choosing the safer more silent route.   
"There will be no more of that from either of you. Alistair, Zevran has returned to help not hinder. Zev you know better."   
Alistair huffed crossing his arms.   
"Can we work together?" She asked them "If we can't, I'll leave you both here."  
Both men nodded.  
"Good," she smiled finally letting them off. Aemon passed by and spoke to her softly dragging her away. Leaving Alistair and Zevran sitting side by side. Alistair was the first to move, pulling something from his pocket and flicking the missing glove at him.   
"Don't you dare leave her again." He said quietly "Not like that."   
Zeveran glanced up at the King, still the foolish Chantry boy in love with the Warden, but also the King of Ferelden protecting his dearest friend. "The maker himself will be hard pressed to make it happen."   
Alistair nodded, obviously his honesty passed the test. He patted the rogues shoulder before standing "I guess the best man won." He shook his head and left the room.

_Those damned Crows, cousin. As bad as the birds flocking after carrion. It's in their eyes, they watch and wait then crow at you from a high off place. Ah_

"This is the beauty you lost your life too!" Taliesan exclaimed descending the steeps in the side street of Denerium.   
"I can see why you faltered Zevran, she even pales Rinna's beauty by comparison." He looked her up an down still not acknowledging her. "But really." He turned to his former college "Is it worth this."   
Dae raised her eyebrow and crossed her arms impatiently. "You mind addressing me like a person instead of a piece of meat?"  
"My sweet you will be meat soon enough."  
Reaching for his weapons Zevran made to threaten him. Dae held up her hand to reign him in.   
She lay a hand on the assassins shoulder. "Why don't you do all of us a favour and hop back on a boat and get lost on the way to Antiva."   
Taliesan laughed "And put my neck on the block for you as well. No, you could be naked dripping in honey and I would still value my life more. There is always another pretty girl, right Zevran?" Both Assassin and Warden turned their heads to hear Zevran's answer,   
"No." He said and Dae smiled "There is not one single person quite like her."   
Taliesen's eyes grew wide as he realised his feet wouldn't move. Neither would his arms, torso or mouth. He tried to call his fellow crows to attack. He felt the girls ice cold fingers at his neck paralysis spreading from her touch.   
One of Taliesan's fellow crows drew his bow. The arrow shaking as he held the string taught. "Let him go." He demanded.  
Morrigan saw the look in Dae's eye, gone were the days where she might have considered letting the rat free. Now she knew he would only come back and only in death would they leave her alone.   
"We have no gripe with the witch or the king. Send them away and this can be over." He continued to say. Dae turned slowly to face him as the rest drew their weapons. Morrigan grabbed Zevran by the back of his collar and pulled Alistair as she could back to a safe distance.   
"Yes, let's this be over." Clouds gathered, Morrigan felt the hair on her arms stand on end. She smirked, proud of how far her friend had come in the year. The patch of back alley became dark before their eyes. Thunder ringing through the sky. Some of the Crows looked up, one managed a colourful curse before the lightning began raining. It leapt from person to person, the storm swallowing up the area they stood in.   
When none were left standing the storm dissipated. The bright day shone where the clouds had been.   
Morrigan congratulated the young warden "One less enemy to worry about."   
Dae nodded, she still wasn't comfortable with the destruction she could bring with magic. She felt that she was playing into the fears of the Templars. Most of her life she had slipped under the radar in the circle. Everything she did focused on healing, while the other children were playing with fire and ice and lightning she was learning wards, paralysis, and restorations. The real world had forced her hand.  
"I'm sorry about your former comrade." She said to Zevran.  
"Don't be," He said shaking his head "Taliesan would have killed both of us, with out a second thought."  
"Still wasn't he your friend?"  
Zevran sighed "In the sense that we had worked together and not actively tried to harm each other. Other wise not really."   
He flashed her his most winning smile to try elevate her worried frown. "You know I have said before you would be a brilliant assassin.   
Dae laughed "These days it seems like the safer Occupation."

_We are ready to face the arch demon, and by that I mean we have readied the four armies, given them armour weapons charms and spells, training and supplies to fight. Whether we will ever be truly ready to fight the Arch Demon and end the blight is another story._  
I am glad Zevran returned to me, my nights are plagued with the Arch Demons words now, of a mirror, of shrieks and monsters. Having arms to hold you in those moments of panic is nice. He worries, I see it when he looks at me, he has noticed the change in me, I don't know if I should let him know why.  
I haven't told any one, its like a shadow stands behind me every day and I can feel it but I can't tell anyone. At the moment they need to focus on the arch demon.   
The blight comes first, I come second. I just wish I had more time.   
I know your wise cousin, you taught me many lesson's when you came and stayed, you taught me about the landscape, and you taught me valour, and courage to keep my mind sharp and my eyes open. You always told the best stories thought not the normal tales they would tell the girls. You changed them so the princess saved the day, or the little lost tinder girl found strength and carried on.   
I know why you did that, why you changed the story. To give us hope, Bethany and I, even Carver hung on your every word when you spoke. You had power as you sat by the candle light to break hearts. You never did.  
This is what I must do. Spin a tale of hope. Rather than let them know the truth that hangs over me.  
If we loose hope we loose everything.   
Never loose hope, and never waste the time you have. Hours slip by like seconds when the shadow is at your back.  
Dae 


End file.
